It has truly been the best thing I have done all summer- and I have done lots of amazing things this summer (blew off a stupid depressed guy I had a crush on, ran a race along a mountain top, journeyed to the top of the highest building in North America with my children, hugged my mom, reconnected with my sister, etc.).
That simple act of forcing myself to reach out instead of looking inward (and often caving in on myself and my fears) has taught me to actually open my heart to loving, really loving, connecting, sharing, and enjoying whatever they have to offer. I have found so much joy and contentedness right here where I am, with my sweet, fun, and funny girlfriends, my old Grandpa-guy friend, a sweet Grandma colleague (who I think has now made it her mission to hug me weekly), and also, yes, new surprising attention from men (that I can usually take or leave because my sense of self no longer depends on that attention to get out of bed in the morning).
I am in the enjoying/joyful phase of all this, feeling like my reaching out of my shell has enabled me to give love, support and encouragement to others like never before. And- I am getting ALL THAT LOVE back! And more! It has become a lovefest! It has improved all of my relationships, my mothering too- I am able to calmly give my kids so much more now that I don’t feel like love is in short supply.
Today, I am going to a party. Attractive men will be there… One man with whom I have felt waves of interest going back and forth… It could be the test of all of my training… Will I be able to stay in that content, self-confident, giving and receiving place? Or will I get shy and cave inward in fear?
I choose to think optimistically. I am going to give support, love and encouragement to others without worry about what is returned. My focus will be laughter and giving (and as Surrey Gal would say “Try not to get smashed”). http://surreygal.wordpress.com
I love you dearly and consider you one of the greatest friends one could ever hoped to be blessed with! Through your lovefest I have been blessed and also am continue the sharing of love that you have started. You are having an incredible tidalwave effect! Just wanted you to know that I love you and appreciate your friendship! Thanks for the good times, support, encouragement and of course the laughs! Love ya!
Woo hoo Sandy! I am so excited that you are experiencing this lovefest too. Pretty amazing, what this snowball can start, huh? I can’t wait to get together and hear about your lovefest snowball ripple. You are a dear precious person in my life too. I still remember the day I met you : ), eating chips together at an awkward table of single moms. I hope to see you soon, Sweet Sandy.
Surrey, I laughed so hard when I read your post this morning. You are too funny. I will avoid mad dogs today and try to act like a lady 🙂 I will let you all know what happens with the cute guy today, now that no one knows who I am! haha.
I don’t know if it’s a new address, but I can see the blog. I’m wondering if it will come up in my subscriptions. Hopefully.
Oh, and almost forgot. Try not to get smashed 😉
And enjoy those attractive men there, maybe get yourself one for a longer period of time 🙂